School does not prepare students for the world of work

Мнение автора +
I personally believe that school plays a significant role in preparing students for the professional world +. Firstly, that is the place where students get access to various sources of knowledge, broaden their horizon and mindset which they will need for career-making +. Secondly, logical and critical skills gained at school will be essential for young people at work if they want to overcome challenges and think independently (+) Finally, school is a key factor in children’s socializing, it enhances their soft skills like leadership, networking and conflict resolution(+). Each of these talents (какие именно таланты перечислены выше? Только навыки ) are indispensable in today’s job market (логика these )(-) .
Professional career/professional life
To broaden mindset такого сочетания скорее всего не встречается
The key factor

Мнение оппонента +-
However, some people disagree and claim that students do not get prepared for the real world of work because of the school rules (+). They believe that at school children are forced to obey teachers and are not allowed to have a different opinion (-) . As a result,(school) graduates lack confidence and are not ready to make their own decisions это можно написать и о периоде в школе – нет связи с работой) .
Как школьные правила мешают в будущем в работе?
Аргументы неточные – можно отнести к проблеме в школе

Опровержение +-
I am afraid I cannot agree with this idea (какую именно идею вы представлена в этом параграфе)
In my opinion, teaching to follow the rules does not mean teaching blind obedience, but to show respect to others, so it cannot hinder students’ development.
Желательно в каждом параграфе показать для работы (the world of work)